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Jun. 20th, 2017



Hey guys, remember Homecoming? That story I talked about non-stop for...a lot of years? And then how I said I was going to adapt it into something original? Well, "original"? Yeah, it finally happened!

USA: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B072TMQN51
UK: https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B072TMQN51

Aaaand I guess now you'll all know my real name. Farewell, Internet anonymity! If I get a sudden flurry of Facebook friend requests guess I'll know what's behind it lol.

May. 1st, 2017


just me?

I've been trying to pay more attention to the colonies lately since starting my Hedda fic. I was watching the episode where Quatre pilots Wing Zero for the first time, and in the bit right before he blows up that colony, OZ are checking in from various areas and I noticed the shot below. Pardon the crappy screenshot, not helped by my sad attempt at lightening it! I thought it was interesting for a couple of reasons, firstly because it looks like an agricultural zone in a space colony which is just naturally very interesting, and secondly because...is it just me or is that a windmill? Why would you need a windmill on a farm in a space colony? How would that even work, apart from decoratively? I mean, I know the colonies generate weather, we are shown rain and snow on colonies in various sources, but...wind? I'm probably mistaken, right?

I also watched the earlier episode in which Quatre's father dies and the narrator very clearly states that Mr Winner emigrated to the colonies, a fact which somehow never stuck with me before and kinda blows all my carefully crafted backstory out of the water haha. Here I'd been assuming the Winner side of Quatre's family had been in space for a while. Ah, well!

Mar. 12th, 2017


thoughts for the day

Becoming aware of certain recurring themes and patterns in my fics, noticeably how you never REALLY know your parents, do you? I knew I'd written a bit about that in one or two recent-ish stories (I mean, GW is so riddled with orphans and daddy issues it's surely hard to avoid completely), but then I re-read something positively ancient and was startled to discover nigh-identical musings from when I was a teenager. Clearly my thought processes have not evolved over the last 15 years as much as I'd thought(/hoped)!

I'm also aware of how the pattern my recent stories have taken follows the same basic structure of 1) woman feels trapped by circumstances; 2) woman tries to change said circumstances; 3) TRAGEDY.

I'm... not sure I want to know what all this says about me and my life hahaha!

Mar. 5th, 2017


oh, hedda

Oh look a new production of Hedda you can watch in the cinema on 9 March.

Feb. 17th, 2017


unfinished [fic] The General's Daughter

Previous post too long; continued here. Again, all comments gratefully received!

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unfinished [fic] The General's Daughter

Realized I haven't shown off the progress I've made on this. Previous update is also included here. Comments gratefully received, on the off chance anyone's reading! :)

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Feb. 16th, 2017


Donald Trump:Quatre Winner::

It's an incomplete analogy. (That's how you write those, right? It's been a while.) Obviously, Quatre's not a horrible villain, but he is a fancypants rich boy that the GW fandom from time to time enjoys imagining going into politics down the line. I've used that schtick before, but I didn't have all these news articles about Donald Trump and the emoluments clause of the Constitution to draw on then! It could be a much more nuanced thing than I'd previously considered. I might have to drag some of this stuff into my revisions of VOG when I next get round to those...

Dec. 19th, 2016



I've realized that my headcanon vision of Sally's dad described in the entry below could also be summarised as "Donald Trump". Ewwww. Sorry, Sally.

Oct. 1st, 2016



I miss fandom. The glory days in the early 2000s of highly active MLs when people would chat (at length!) about all aspects of Character X or Plot Point Y. There was a brief time after that had faded when the forums on FFN seemed to be pretty active, but I don't think that lasted long. Then LJ had its heyday, which I completely missed, although here I still am for some reason haha. I get the impression the fandom hotspot these days might be tumblr?? But you guys, I'm OLD, I don't GET tumblr, wah wah wah. I sort of keep hoping I might strike up some life changing conversation with FFN's PM function, and really I shouldn't complain - I do have nice chats there reasonably regularly, but what can I say, I want MOAR! :) Ah well, such is life in a dying fandom and when you don't have anything particularly interesting to say anyway. :)

So, purely for my own edification, here are the things I'm amusing myself with these days...

1) That Noin fic I was so proud of finishing? I ended up deciding to take it down *sob* to try and adapt it into something "original". So that's kind of happening, although I still feel slightly nuts and paranoid and guilty for attempting it. And because the fanfic version was such a major accomplishment for me after so many years, I miss it. I miss seeing it on my FFN profile. And I kind of feel like Noin DESERVED that fic, because she's such a great character and there's not enough lengthy, nuanced fic out there for her. I felt like I was doing my bit by telling that story and hypocritically I don't want it to be gone. It's a shame that the qualities that made me so pleased with it as a fanfic also made me decide that it would be worth taking it out of fandom. Okay, that's not really amusing, more just a pity fest, so moving right along...

2) Dorothy as Hedda Gabler continues and I am still pretty pumped about it, but it has taken a back seat to my trying to sort out item 1.

3) My head-canon Sally backstory. It goes thusly: Sally's parents divorce when she is still very young. She is raised primarily by her father, who serves in the Alliance at some middling rank. Her childhood was by no means terrible, but her father was not the most responsible person ever. He contracts syphilis as a result of a poorly judged liaison, which he firstly does not bother getting properly diagnosed for quite some time and when he finally does, once he can no longer ignore the effect on his health, it proves to be of an antibiotic-resistant strain and he is unable to rid himself of it. Over the course of years, his condition slowly deteriorates and he eventually is no longer fit to serve. On turning 17, Sally joins the Alliance as the most efficient way of obtaining her medical license, the remote village in China which she calls home not boasting a large number of other opportunities and her father's disease also limiting her options. A nurse becomes necessary to care for her father. At some point, once we are into GW-proper, to Sally's consternation, her father and his nurse marry. This is especially bewildering to her because the nurse is a year younger than she is; her stepmother seems more like a younger sister. She gets along with the young woman well enough, but she cannot understand why you'd marry a person a) old enough to be your father and b) who you know has an incurable venereal disease that you are in fact treating him for. It's also uncomfortable because it kinda highlights how if, they weren't related, she'd probably be her dad's "type". Ick. Not something she wants to examine too closely. In the years following EW, her father eventually dies. I don't know why this scenario amuses me so much, but it does.

4) Duo's unrequited crush on Sally. (This is one of those weird things where as soon as I had this idea, I suddently started seeing 2xS fics everywhere having never noticed any before. Okay, maybe not everywhere, but more than one over just a couple of months, which was more than I'd have expected.) I don't really envision Duo acting on this in any serious way, mostly just having this "yes, hot older woman" horny teenage fantasy whilst on Libra at the end of GW, and then many years later awkwardly trying to flirt while Sally remains mostly oblivious.

5) 2xH? I feel bad for HIlde in fandom because she NEVER seems to be in character, just relegated to standard BFF or supporting female role. I don't know if I can do any better by her, but I'd like to try. Unfortunately, the only idea I have is really more Duo-centric and just about how he views her and does not altogether sit well with my feminist sensibilities. But there's something about how, having spent much of his childhood hungry, Duo's really attracted to slightly more voluptuous women (like Sally?!?!), although he's been with Hilde since the end of the war and is definitely into her. I kind of imagine, she's not a soldier anymore, she's not, like, doing stomach crunches every day, and she develops just the teensiest of bellies, and it just drives him wild.

6) 5xH! In which Wufei meets Hilde properly for this first time at say Preventers and is immediately drawn to her simply because she reminds him so much of Meiran. Again, can I get manage this in an awesome in character Hilde-empowerment way?!

7) Duo hates nature. Trowa, Quatre, and Wufei all have these "communing with nature/wildlife" moments in the show so I imagine them quite enjoying life planetside, whereas Duo just wants to get the hell back to space, where there's no giant squid or insects that want to eat you alive or any of that nonsense. "I'm not swimming in that lake! Fish crap in that lake!"

8) Completely unrelated to GW, the Doctor Who/X-Files crossover that I have convinced my friend to write for me. I have longed for it for years and it's gonna be so gooooood! I'm kind of stunned no one seems to have done it already, tbh. The pig slaves from the Empire State Building episode seem like perfect X Files fodder to me and I have been promised lots of Scully being awesome.

Jun. 5th, 2015


unfinished [fic] The General's Daughter

I'm making progress! Felt like sharing somewhere to celebrate (and in case I never get any farther haha).

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